LOSING IT.

HERE ARE SOME OF THE THINGS PEOPLE HAVE BEEN LOSING LATELY:                          

The power of limbs. That’s why therapist Nicola Goldsmith encourages us to exercise our most precious limbs. I don’t think Anthony Weiner needs your encouragement, Nicola. Oh wait – she isn’t talking about that limb. She’s talking about our thumbs. Apparently smartphone users are experiencing thumb fatigue (telegraph.co.uk, 29 July). This worries mobile phone provider O2. They want to roll out new devices and make sure their customers are ready. To help them meet the challenge, they have developed thumbells. Okay now we are all set.

Blood. (Globe 30 July) After submitting to a scrubbing lady at a Moroccan hammam – a public  bathhouse, Melanie Chambers reports broken blood vessels and bruises. But she was willing to pay the price for cultural immersion. Besides, it makes for a good Facebook story.

Stigma. Pope Francis is ready to embrace homosexuals. Who am I to judge? he asks. Oh, good. Maybe we can have women priests, too. Nope. John Paul II has definitely closed the door on that issue. Well, someone had to do the dirty work, so that Francis can play rock star to the nuns (NYTimes, 28 July).

Sleep -- by a couple with a neighbor playing porn movies after midnight. Luckily Toronto Life runs an advice column, The Urban Diplomat. He counsels them to be, well, diplomatic. I say, turn the other cheek. That’s a quote from the bible, in case you thought I was being ironic.

Property value -- due to a neighbour’s weekly ragbag garage sale. In that case, the Urban Diplomat advises hypocrisy. Play the charming and sympathetic neighbor to their face, call the bylaw officer behind their back. I say: skip the charm.

Game -- at the Backyard Axe-throwing League. I'd lose that game, but maybe you have axe throwing potential. Check out the reviews on yelp.ca and heal your inner primal man. Apparently it’s a form of satisfying hurling, as opposed to the other kind of hurling.

The Canadian senate. The NDP is calling for the Senate to be scrapped (Globe August 1^st). Would love to lose those deadweights, but so far it's just a gleam in the NDP's eye.