THE RENAISSANCE MARRIAGE: HOW TO KEEP YOUR MAN HAPPY.

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More advice from Francesco Barbaro’s marriage manual.

• Loquacity cannot be sufficiently reproached in women and silence be sufficiently applauded.  If you have to talk, girls, keep it short. Hello and good-bye will do. The idea is to give the impression of being provoked into conversation rather than provoking it.
• Women can never be too hot, right? Wrong. Abstain from foods that encourage and instil the desires of the flesh. Curb your libido because
• A couple must use intercourse mainly in the hope of procreating.
• Once the wife is pregnant, forget about sex. I admonish you: When the ship is full, admit no more passengers.
• The best occupation for a wife, pregnant or not, is to stay home and oversee the household. It is her duty to see that no harm comes to her husband’s wine cellar, pantry, and oil supply.
• In short: To keep your man happy, shut up, put up, and procreate.
• Conclusion: I think that ear guards are far more necessary for a wife than for a wrestler. His ears are only subject to blows, hers are subject to humiliation.