Wednesday, 11 September 2013

NOT THERE. A lesson on how to apply politics to your life.

After much diplomatic back and forth and after some serious scowling by Charlie Rose during his interview with Assad, there is a good chance the Syrian president will destroy the chemical weapons he supposedly does not have and did not use. Life application: You know those New Year’s resolutions you make and break? Why don’t you do like Assad, and resolve to give up the vices you do not have? For example, if you’ve never smoked pot, now’s the time to renounce that dangerous habit. Or if you’ve been a vegetarian for the last ten years, what better time to renounce foie gras and protest cruelty against geese! You get the idea?

On the national stage, Quebec is about to draw up a Charter of Values, listing what not to wear because those items of clothing might give away your religious convictions.  There’s a great idea. Let’s draw up a charter of fashion values that puts us all on an equal footing. There are civil servants who sport dresses and high heels at work. Wearing potato sacks and gender neutral running shoes should be mandatory for them. Otherwise they might indoctrinate citizens and keep them from identifying with the sex of their choice.     

Meanwhile Toronto Councillor Kristyn Wong-Tam persuaded three builders to donate money to Bixi Bikes to make up for the parking spaces they won’t provide (Metro 11 Sept). Watch out, tax payers. Next thing you know, Kristyn will persuade you to pay more taxes to make up for the garage you don’t have or the basement you have neglected to finish.

I say: Let’s send Kristyn to Ottawa and see if she can get senators to donate money for the time they are not attending sessions. And applying that to life, you could donate money to Rogers for the channels you are not watching. Oh, you’re doing that already?

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